Reflective Leadership Journal
Report
I consider myself to have an extensive knowledge in the field of Power Plant operations and maintenance; having had been trained by Japanese engineers from construction, commissioning and operations and maintenance of a huge Power Plant back in the Middle east. The experience that I have had acquired through the years from my guides were both rewarding and enriching.
Looking back at my Zero moment, I must say that I have come a long way.
It was a traumatic incident that still haunts me, on a Power Plant operations point of view. I was young, with no firm grasp of the knowledge and experience compared to my colleagues. I was intimidated with their achievements and experience compared to my budding career as a power plant operator. Later, I realise that with much passion I have had invested in learning, reading, asking questions and my eagerness to be at par with them, did I realise that I am already at their level, I just didn’t realise that yet during those times. Any operator could easily walk out or flipped out or black out upon having one section of the Power Plant exploded; but I was there, I owned up and brought back the Power Plant in working order.
It may have been one of my zero moments in my life but that instance, looking back, have had developed me so far in my career as a power plant professional. I feel sorry, probably feeling guilty, for not really standing up to my manager for what is right and what I was trained to do; I feel intimidated and tends to be silent when higher authority gives instructions. I have learned and flex my muscles now to stand firm on what my knowledge and experiences suggests. This is evident with my Hero Moments, wherein I am willing to walk-away from a job passion that has taken toll to my mental health. A decision that is both personal and professionally considered.
Browsing back to my diary entries, I have observed that I am more engaged in helping others, to the best of my ability. I am more supportive to my colleagues first and share my insights and knowledge/experience for everyone’s benefit. Probably a trait that goes a long way from our family ancestry. I believe that I am more a supporter than a leader. I believe that the leadership in me always takes a backseat when I see and feel that some other guys are more competitive than me. I am more than happy to support people, teammates, colleague to achieve our common goals and more than happy to advocate for them. Nevertheless, I have noticed that, under pressure, and if the occasion calls for it, my leadership qualities are naturally coming through. From the learning curve I have experienced from my zero moment, and to my hero moment which I feel I have had handled just fine, not perfect but I can live with that.
I never knew about me having a paradoxical mindset, but from the attached survey in Session 7: “Do you have a paradox mindset?” To my surprise, I got 18. When I was younger, I really don’t want conflicts and misunderstanding. But I like the idea of being the one to solve a problem. To be the centre of attention. People struggle under pressure, and I believe I am not one of those. With both personal and professional experiences, I can say that I am not easily broken.
Reflect
As an experienced Power Plant Control Room Operator, I am trained to investigate all facets of Power Plant Operations; including projections of Power Requirement and how to handle sudden abrupt power load requirement. With this trait, going to the course, I am confident that I can adapt well to said subject. I was mistaken. Evidently, I did not perform well as I thought I should have.
As per the first exercise (farmer’s activity), it is really my nature to help and volunteer, especially if its in my capacity to help-out. My mindset was clear taking up the course, I should be openly friendly, adaptively active, and focused. The process requires active and effective leadership on the path to success. (Bason & Austin; 2019) As I volunteered, I was instructed to just relay two rules during the exercise and not to give more. To which I was so close to helping them to solve the riddle. I was thinking that if I am the one solving the problem, I have had already solved it easily. But then again given that I knew about the problem and the solution, I could be bias.
During the Inventing workshop, about the inverted plastic cups and table knives, I was so frustrated with myself because I know the riddle, I believe I have watched it beforehand, but I gave way to my group mates who obviously was enjoying the exercise. I was thinking another way of solving the problem; putting a new point of view on how to solve it, sort of thinking outside the box.
During the snake and ladders improvement exercise, my patience almost ran out because I felt my ideas were being ridicule and neglected; especially upon seeing the make-face of one of my groupmates. I was treating the snake and ladder improvement to be simple and direct, with no fancy items to be included. Afterall, it is not about the game itself but the bonding between a father and his daughter. But looking at the eyes of my groupmate, I can see that they want to prove a point and impress the instructor. So, I let them be and act as a coordinator on what they wanted to achieve. Conflict and Tension is necessary for innovation. (Nyberg & Moliterno; 2019) It turns out that they have a much better idea than I have in mind, nevertheless, it was supposed to be a group activity, every opinion should have mattered.
When given a task, I always start-of on top of my mind with the 5 W: Who, what, when, where, why (and how); as with these questions, it will bring clarity on how to go about with the task. During the “trap in the cavern” exercise, I was again trying to think outside the box scenario, suggesting to rather dig up to escape than to work our way out through unmarked North-South-East-West, where North and South have poisonous gas. That didn’t go well. The Juxtaposition: My vision and the current reality don’t really appeal to the professor.
As the instructor was getting weary of our progress, I began thinking of the materials available and from my time in physics, a battery can be used as compass, but I forgot how to, that’s why I was hesitant to lead the group. In the end, we’re all dead in the exercise as no one have sold the riddle and the instructor got frustrated. The instructor was frustrated not because we did not solve the riddle but rather, he was frustrated because he hasn’t exercised what he is teaching us all along, engagement with your peers. We were all dumbfounded on our backs on what shall we do. I am equally frustrated as well since I have a background for this kind of stuff but obviously did not utilize it well. I any case, now I know how to use a battery for a compass.
Reframe
Sloan Distributed Leadership Model suggests four capabilities: sensemaking, relating, visioning, and inventing. I believe I am still on the process of finding where I am good at. I really don’t worry much about being consistent (W.K. Smith et al.; 2016) Though through this assignment, through self-reflecting, it gave me a better understanding on where I accomplish much, and what is needed for improvement. Being a power plant operator, I believe I am good in sensemaking. Having had the experience and exposure to clearly navigate through various components of the power plant for a smooth operation, part of my job is to sense and adjust certain power plant parameters for a more efficient and safe manner of power plant operations. As evident on my Zero moments, I have become an expert in power generation through experience in the field. I have learned to incorporate analytical situation that may involve catastrophic events and failures and prevent it from happening.
I have a reason to believe that I need to improve on my relating. From the class exercises, I really need to improve my advocacy, advocating my opinions and ideas, I should really exert more effort into it. I should learn how to impose my disposition in getting across my views and ideas, not to just stay silent and wait for others to come up with their ways of solving problems. I may have the best solution, but it will be in vain if I will keep mum about it.
From DE5, I can attest that I have a good sense of visioning. There is already a risk assessment @ Pinjar Power Plant Operators going on shifts, but it did not mention any night lights being turned-on during the night as the plant were previously unmanned hence night lights are not important. I have submitted a proposal that night lights should be automatically turned on during the night, but I have received no response. Then I have re-submitted the proposal but this time with safety implications and hazards involved without a night light. The response was accepted with high priority and urgent. And earned me a recognition for safety initiative. In Risk Assessment, we have been trained to potentially combined efforts in identifying and analysing potential events in our workplace thus a clear sense of visioning is involved.
I find it interesting that sometimes my creative mind somehow impresses me. Though I really need to set my mind straight to achieve this feat. I always look for simple things to solve any problem, just like going back to basics in dealing with complicated dilemma. As Steve Jobs would put it: Simple is best. (S. Jobs; 2011) Back in the Snake and Ladder re-inventing exercise, my idea was to incorporate a truth or consequences concept, wherein a player who will roll a dice on a snake box will pick a consequences card and will do said consequence. Whilst a truth card will be pick if a player rolled into a ladder box. The truth or consequences card will be pre-determined by both players and shall comprise fun memories enjoyed by both father and Daughter. As the objective of the game really is to have a longer bonding between a father and his daughter. Eventually my idea was scrapped, and the group opted to a more complicated re-invention of the game.
With a score of 18, I must have a paradox mindset. As a seasoned Power Plant Operator, I am trained to always study the cause and effect of the adjustments made in power plant parameters. Most of the time, an adjustment made from the Generator have an adverse effect on the Electrical Grid. Hence a balancing act between Generators and Electric Grid Frequency are required to have a smooth operation. This is my day-to-day responsibility, and I would like to believe that I am good at it.
Redesign
From my zero moments, clearly, I need to improve my advocacy skills. I need to understand my failure, and lack thereof, my advocacy skills. Enthusiasm to ensure the right lessons are learned and remedies are employed. (Edmonson; 2011) The conversation palette has given me the insight on where to start in developing my advocacy skills. (Senge; 1994)
From my zero moments, I should have been firm and exercise my advocacy to stop the maintenance procedure on the steam turbine and insist to my manager that the best way to proceed on the maintenance was to shutdown the Turbine to avoid unnecessary problem. I should have clearly had emphasis on the dangers involved in maintaining the turbine whilst in operation. In retrospect, my skills in identifying a problem, both risks and hazards, is a strength to cherish with.
I should really stop making excuses and let other people lead while deep inside I know that I can do better. As they say, be the leader you are born to be. Regardless of failures and mistakes, the important thing is that you stand up and take the lead. You may fail or you may succeed, at least you tried and gained experience from it.
REFERENCE
Christian Bason; Robert D. Austin; (2019); The right way to lead design thinking; p. 86; Harvard Business Review; Harvard Business School Publishing
Anthony J. Nyberg; Thomas P. Moliterno; (2019); Handbook of Research on Strategic Human Capital Resources: Human resource management strategy and practice: from individual motivation to dynamic capabilities; p. 190
Wendy K. Smith, Marianne W. Lewis; Michael L. Tushman; (2016); “Both/And” Leadership; p. 64; Harvard Business Review; Harvard Business School Publishing
Steve Jobs; (1998); Interview in Business Week; Bloomberg; 25 May 1998
Amy C. Edmondson; (2011); Strategies for leaning from failure; Harvard Business review: we are programmed at an early age to think that failure is bad. That belief prevents organisation from effectively learning from their missteps; p. 54
Peter Senge, et al.; (1994); The fifth discipline fieldbook: strategies and tools for building a leaning organisation
