Ten years.

For the past decade, Australia has been my home, a land of boundless opportunities.

About 12 years ago, I ventured beyond the Middle East in search of new horizons. The array of options was both exhilarating and daunting. Armed with my experience as a Power Plant Operator and comprehensive training from Japanese Engineers, I felt poised to make my mark in a new setting.

At that time, I also contemplated starting a business in the Philippines to be closer to my ailing father. But then I met my ex-wife, who was determined to relocate to Australia. She was eager to escape the derision of her relatives who had criticized her for not passing job interviews abroad and failing to obtain her Occupational Therapist certification.

Enter me: compelled to play the hero and help my ex-wife realize her dream of moving to Australia.

The process was initially straightforward – pass the IELTS exam and compile a Competency Demonstration Report (CDR) to validate my engineering credentials. A score of 60 was sufficient for migration. However, for her to join me as a secondary sponsor, we had to marry, which was complicated by the fact that she was still married. I covered the costs of her annulment. Though the expenses for visas, annulment, our wedding, her child’s tuition, and my father’s dialysis and medicines, plus our ancestral home’s renovation were substantial, I managed them with my sister’s help.

The experience proved to be financially exhausting and emotionally draining.

Despite this, I remained committed. I never anticipated that my ex-wife’s attitude would shift once our Australian visa was approved. Shortly after our marriage, she became pregnant, and with our move to Australia scheduled around her due date, we face a difficult choice. She was unwilling to stay behind until after the birth. She insisted we move immediately to Australia, but I couldn’t leave my father, especially given his dialysis needs. I needed to find a caregiver for him before we could proceed.

It was heart-wrenching when she proposed leaving my father in an aged care facility so we could move right away. Her selfishness in pursuing her Australian dream was disheartening. Torn between my duty to my father and my commitment to my ex-wife, I chouse to prioritize my father’s well-being.

One evening, I shared my decision with father, expressing my intent to put our migration plans on hold and stay with him until his health improved. To my astonishment, he urged me to find a caregiver for him and continue with our plans, stressing the importance of our future. His selflessness and insight left me profoundly moved.

Following this, my relationship with my ex-wife unravelled rapidly. She seemed to pit me against my father, making me feel used and manipulated, revealing that her primary interest was securing an Australian visa.

Tragically, she suffered a miscarriage. Despite her obstetrician’s advice to rest due to the baby’s fragile state, she continued working against my wishes. She claimed she needed 30 thousand pesos for her child’s tuition, even though I believed I had already covered these expenses.

Respect in our relationship dissolved, and I felt like a mere bystander, excluded from her life and deprived of the intimacy that should have been ours.

Eventually, lies and deceit emerged.

I discovered she had an affair and planned to meet this person in Australia, then file for divorce. This was the breaking point for me, and I confronted her. Her deceit continued, revealing that her plans were merely a scheme to extract money from her lover.

I considered withdrawing their visa, as the primary sponsor, I had the right to do so. Yet, I chose not to act out of spite. I knew that migrating to Australia would offer a brighter future for her child and for her. To this day, I have no regrets about that decision.

A decade of bliss in the land down under.

To God be the Glory!

 

---- summary of a book I recently read.